Book Review: Becoming Nicole: The Transformation of an American Family / Amy Ellis Nutt

We had a couple of guests (Jeff Perrotti and Landon Callahan) present at a professional development workshop with the goal of sharing how we can best support our LGBT+ students. (And honestly - when teachers learn to support one population of students better, I think that there are ripples that extend to all populations.)

Jeff shared with us some books that provide fodder so that we can be our most informed selves, including the biography Becoming Nicole by Amy Ellis Nutt. I gravitated toward this title because I believe that we can better understand other people by "walking in their shoes" (as my mother would say) and what better way to do that than by reading about a person or people who have walked a different path, in this case the transwoman, Nicole (Nikki) Maines.

The book Becoming Nicole begins with Kelly and Wayne Maines visiting the sonographers office as they look at their two identitical twin boys. As the story progresses you learn about Kelly and Wayne's backstory including that the bio mother of the twins was a cousin of Kelly's who (at 16 years of age) felt unprepared to take on the task of raising twins. Kelly and Wayne decided to adopt the infants and three months later (October 7, 1997) had two beautiful babies in their arms, Jonas and Wyatt.

As they grew into toddlers, the twins started developing their own personalities with Wyatt loving everything Barbie and Jonas gravitating toward Power Rangers. As they continued to grow they both loved acting out stories with Jonas playing the male roles and Wyatt the female roles. As time progressed Wyatt increasingly identified as female, as Nikki  -- this book shares the trials and tribulations of that story. (OK, that was totally oversimplified, but I had to start somewhere.)

I really loved this book. I was expecting something similar to Being Jazz by Jazz Jennings. Nicole and Jazz have similar stories. But what strengthens this book is the author - it was great to have a voice outside the family who could share this story. Nutt really did her homework. She listened to a lot of voices to get this story just right. Additional information is shared in this book that makes Nikki's story more three dimensional - for example there are several chapters on the brain and gender. Also the family's hardships, struggles, and battles endured to secure the rights of all trans kids were well spelled out. This book ends with Nikki's graduation, and her gender-affirming surgery which was her last goal before entering college. 

But the end of the book is NOT the end of Nicole's story. She went to college and has developed an acting career. You can find her splashed across the internet. She has remained a trans activist  - you can find her on Twitter. 

This book is worth the read. I will never be a transwoman. But it was nice to walk in Nikki Maines shoes for a little while and learn about how it feels to be a transperson in school. Walking in others' shoes helps me be the best educator that I can be.

One of my favorite quotes was something Nicole told her father, "Stories move the walls that need to be moved." I hope that people pick up this book and read it and feel their walls move. You can find Becoming Nicole on the shelves of the Nashua Public Library or through Libby in both Ebook and Audiobook formats.

Finally note, there are a ton of resources at the end of this book to delve into if you want more information.